Whitewater where?

You know that you're going somewhere in the middle of nowhere when you're aisle seat also happens to be a window seat. That was my thought anyway as I flew to Madison, WI where I then took a rental car to Whitewater, Wisconsin. I was right, but so mistaken.

As I took the 12 18 Hwy, and eventually just the 12, I learned some things about Wisconsin. Here are 7 of them:

1. Your barns aren't big enough if you can't fit your home inside of them.

2. If there isn't a Haunted Field, Haunted House, or Haunted Forest every 5 miles in October, you're missing something.

3. Corn fields work mysteriously well right next to pumpkin fields.

4. The Cheese Shrine in Fort Atkinson should be avoided...unless you like cheese!!!

5. Restaurants are strangely closed on Mondays.

6. There is nothing wrong with a beautiful Victorian with vacant fields 3 1/2 miles in either direction, as long as it fits in each of the barns behind it.

7. Everyone is really nice in this beautiful northern state, except that chick that made us get two scoops of ice cream when we only wanted one. What's up with that?

A Real Day of Training

For Dan

Ft. Worth, TX
August 27th

6:00 am Wake Up, Shower, Shave
7:00 am Eat Breakfast in the hotel or McDonald's or Starbucks
8:00 am Arrive at building to set up projector and Powerpoint slides
8:06 am Place hand-outs on table for participants
8:20 am Introduce my self to participants and managers
8:30 am Begin training
10:15 am Fifteen minute break
10:30 am Train until lunch
12:00 pm Lunch at Sonic!!!!!
1:15 pm Start the afternoon of training
3:00 pm Break
3:15 pm Finish afternoon training
5:15-5:30 pm Wrap-Up training
5:30 pm Answer emails/questions on voicemail
6:15 pm Head to hotel to change/call Sweetheart if possible
7:00 pm Meet training participants/managers/directors for dinner
9:00-9:15 pm Arrive at HGI - check personal email and chill
11:15 pm - Hopefully speak with Sweetheart though CST is two hours later.
11:45 pm Sleep quickly to start again tomorrow

A Day in the Office

Monday - two weeks ago

7:00 am Arrive at Airport
7:04 am Find that flight has been cancelled
7:51 am Arrive at counter in front of real estate agent
7:58 am Find that Airline has rescheduled my flight for tomorrow
8:06 am Plan to drive to another airport that has a flight close to my destination
8:08 am Invite the real estate agent that was behind me in line to pay me for drive to other airport
8:18 am Leave Airport
9:30 am Arrive at other Airport
11:00 am Finally find a parking place in the structure
11:05 am Eat brunch with real estate agent
12:15 pm Read in uncomfortable airport chair
1:15 pm Wake up from nap and read some more
2:05 pm Board flight to Chicago O'Hare
7:05 pm Arrive at the airport named for an incredible man
8:50 pm Find that flight has been delayed for an hour so watched Cowboys/Eagles
9:50 pm Flight is again delayed...pilots hadn't arrived
10:50 pm Flight still delayed...Cowboys win.
11:34 pm Pilots ready the plane after arriving from NE
12:02 am Plane lifts off
1:27 am Plane lands at MSP
3:29 am Arrive at Hampton Inn Rochester
3:40 am Fall asleep
6:30 am Wake
7:30 am Meet up and drive a new hire to New Hire Training
8:30 am Begin training New Hire materials

I actually felt like I had some of my best stuff in that day's training! And that's a day in my life as a trainer...

She's Amazing

For those of you who don't know (you know the few of you that actually read this blog), Jesica is starting a new job today!

AND I COULDN'T BE HAPPIER OR MORE EXCITED FOR HER!!!

So, if you have her number, wish her luck as she embarks on a career in PR, as the wonderful writer and communicator we all know she is!

I know he hasn't met her yet, but I'm sure Tiger will be thrilled with his newest employee!

Way to go, Jesica!

BTW, Jes, I really wanted to call you a tiger, as in "Go get 'em tiger!" I just couldn't figure out how to make it work.

I Need to Read!

Traveling has brought me opportunities to increase my vocabulary! At one time I thought that my word usage was indicative of my education, but the more I thought about it, the more I realized that because of the limited conversations I was having, my vocabulary was dwindling. Consequently, as I speak with fellow passengers on planes or just more people in general (because I'm training) I feel that my verbiage has increased.

While I'm wishing to increase my brain's lexicon, I don't particularly want to reduce my slang usage or the vernacular to which I've been accustomed to. I also don't want to do this just to sound smart, but rather to increase my knowledge so I don't stop learning. With my job, I need to make training interesting and I've found that trainers with larger vocabulary seem to have a better handle on the material as well.

Enough about work, though. The whole purpose of this post was to inquire of good books from any reader of this post. I've found that while I envelope myself in a book I seem to acquire some of the language contained therein. I have a list of 23 books that I've never read that I probably should have by now, but I could use some direction, if anyone out there has any!

Here is my list (and I apologize for a lack of links to a site where they can be purchased):

1984 - Orwell

Brave New World - Orwell

Darkness at Noon - Koestler

Candide - Voltaire

The Firm - Grisham

Inside the Whale - Orwell

A Voyage to Lilliput - Lang

Uncle Tom's Cabin - Stowe

Swim with the Sharks Without Being Eaten Alive - Mackay

The Civil War v.1-3 - Foote

General James Longstreet: Confederacy's Most Controversial Soldier - West

Memoirs of General W.T. Sherman - Sherman

Pale Horse at Plum Run - Leehan

God, Man, and Hollywood - Winchell

All of C.S. Lewis' Works

So, there you have it. My list to go through in the next year. I'm pretty sure I can make it. And I'm fairly certain the words used should help my increase my limited, OK/CA, slang-filled speech.

The Wrench in Our Plans

Jesica and I have plans!

We thought about Arkansas for the Holidays. We have a Cabo trip planned. We have a Europe trip in the works. We spoke with our realtor last week. Since I travel for work now or work remotely, we're looking at other places we could live (not that we're moving). We keep discussing kids because her schooling at its close (but again, this isn't an announcement).

We have plans and those listed above aren't even an eighth of them!

However, everytime we feel we're just to the point where we can move forward...something like this happens:





Yes, this is our Mitsubishi without a transmission! And without AC and without a horn. It seems that they all decided to stop within a week of one another. Horn, then AC, and finally the transmission. And that tow was crazy pricey!




However, with this HUGE setback, we can find hope in more than just the Gospel.

The Redlands Bowl is close! And it is free! Thank you kindly's go to Jesica for a wonderful weekend concert with Lorna Luft and the San Bernardino Symphony! Oh, I love John Williams music (he's an incredible genius) and it is so much better live! Thank you kindly, Sweetie for a great evening!

And Casey is as happy as he's ever been!

And we have each other!

Our plans will come together regardless of a broken, stupid, idiotic, oafish, expensive, dirty-rotten, insensitive, worthless, zany, hairbrained, expensive, absurd, moronic, fatuous, ridiculous, expensive, no-good transmission!

Let's make our plans happen!

She Did It Again

I have really tried to stay to a posting every three days for the last 9 days (quite an accomplishment, eh?), but I had to Blog again today because Jesica has done it again!

http://www.inlandvalleywcr.blogspot.com/

Behold her creativity and additional presence on the web!

Way to go, Sweetheart!

Shuttle Shuffle

This place is CRAZY!

Perhaps you've been here to fight the traffic, parking, people, lack of customer service and security. In addition to those nightmares, it also happens to be far, far away from my home. And when there is a flight at 6:00am that you can't miss, the drive (and everything else) seem so much nastier.

So, on Friday when I was dreading this early morning escapade through LA on Monday morning, my co-workers saved my bacon! They told me of this service (that apparently everyone knows about) that would pick me up whenever I wanted to make it to my flight on time, deliver me and my bags to the airport, and then pick me up when I got back to take me home!

Yes, Super Shuttle is the way to travel - to an airport like LAX. On the way there I slept from 1:15am to 2:30am in the van. I didn't even have to worry about parking or traffic! I then fell asleep on the floor (eww) next to the escalator that led to the security screening area, because they don't open until 4:00am. Jerks. I read and dosed off on the planes to my destination and arrived hungry, but not tired. Yea!

The way home was nice as well. I didn't sleep but met some interesting people! I met a newlywed lawyer for parents who lose their children to Social Services and a couple who had been in Europe for 24 days. And my work paid for it! Thank you kindly Super Shuttle!

Can I hear an "Amen?"

The Big 10,000

Sesame Street taught me a lot! I watched that show all the time. Even when I was at BHS I spent part-time job earnings on Sesame Street products like the gem of 1997. However, I always thought that there was one character who taught me more than I will admit:

Count von Count.

Lately, I have become fascinated with numbers again (this has happened before: like when I started to read the Doctrine and Covenants when I had 138 days left on my mission or when I was turning 15 1/2 and wanted my drivers permit or when I could go on my first date or even better counting the days from when Jesica and I kissed the 1st time to when we kissed again as boyfriend and girlfriend). Though, I must give credit where credit is due - I always remember the Count when my time is spent counting.

And since I'm in a counting mood, today is a really important day for all kinds of reasons:

There are only 2 more days that I have to go to college, ever, this week. (Well, until I start my Masters program next year...)

In 5 days I will be walking in a cap and gown, with passion and gusto.

In 10 days I'm leaving on a jet plane...and the next day (in 11 days) we'll celebrate Jesica's 22nd birthday.

In 98 days we'll celebrate our 2nd Anniversary, but 4th year together as a couple!

In 226 days I'll be 28 - Yikes!

In 2782 days I can run for President - go get those absentee ballots!

And today, Monday, 3 December 2007, I am 10,000 days old!!

So, thank you kindly for any of you who helped me get this far...I CAN count!

Oh, and I usually don't say this, but, "Happy Birthday to me!"

Horror at Work

On Halloween, Jesica and I (and some friends) discovered the joys and pains contained in silent movies. We, for the first time, experienced the horror that is Nosferatu. It actually was a little scary - in more ways than one...I mean, look at the guy, err monster. The point is, as we sat around and made fun of the movie with our friends, we were ingrained with the walk of the monster, with the look of the monster and with the creepy music that played throughout.

So, knowing that Nosferatu could be looming, even after his doomed ending in the movie, it is even scarier when you see someone walk like the monster. If you think that it is creepy on film, I can tell you of an office where you can see this hideous figure daily.

You may think this is rude and malicious - let me explain. She doesn't look like Nosferatu! She only walks like him, hovers like him and I feel the hair on the back of my neck raise as though creepy music is playing in tiny ear pieces I have yet to find when I see her walking towards me.

I'm actually glad that she isn't in my office. And fortunately for you, I won't tell you where to find her. Just know that she is out there waiting for your visit. When you see her, she'll have over-zealous eyes and a craving you just can't understand.

Patent Pending

When I was a kid we went to Galveston, TX. It was the only beach I knew (until we made it to FL for a vacation)...and I loved it. They had seashell shops by the seashore (say that three times fast). They had salt water taffy. They had those little shark heads with a handle at one end that made the shark bite two feet away.

Yeah, like that, but it was a red handle and it was really fun to pull hair with...I digress.

The point is, I got one of these in Galveston. I loved it and thought that it was really handy for a kid. But then I got to thinking about how beneficial it was because I was short. I could reach the snacks on top of the fridge without a chair, though they had to be light enough to grab and transport. So, my little genius mind began to turn.

The world needed a better grabby tool.

So, I began my creation. In less than a month, and with help from Dad, I had a nice grabby tool able to lift 10 lbs at a two foot distance away. It was made of wood and strong wire cables. It was perfect. And then it sat for years.

When I was a teenager, I saw the first one in a store.

Now you can purchase them anywhere and you can choose from 20" all the way to 48".

Recently, I've spoken a lot about the hope that someday someone will invent a DRR (not the Disneyland RailRoad or a Disaster Risk Recovery or a Digitally Reconstructed Radiograph, but a Digital Radio Recorder), much like a DVR (Digital Video Recorder or TIVO for those of you who like name brands - I have a Dual-Tuner myself), but for the radio.

Imagine listening to the radio and talking on the phone at the same time, but you're really involved on the phone and something is said on the radio that was really funny or controversial. But you don't know what it is because you were chatting on the phone. With a DRR you could easily rewind the radio and listen to what you missed.

Imagine, then, hearing a song that you just love and you don't have your mp3 player in the car. With a DRR you could listen to your song over and over and over again.

This is my idea don't steal it!

So, I missed out on the grabby tool. I'd like to make a DRR, but don't have the knowledge to do so. Then last week I went to the store and found another missed Opportunity.

No, I didn't invent York Peppermint Patties, but Jesica's mom gave me a recipe that I thought only she and I had yet discovered.

Holiday Brownies

They are fabulous. And I've only told a few people the secret recipe. Consequently, I was devastated when I got the bag home (and horded them in secret) because I saw the recipe for Holiday Brownies on the back of the bag of holiday packaged York Peppermint Patties.

Mofra, I'm sorry, Hershey stole our recipe!

What have I learned?

Well, if you have a dream, make it happen. Yeah, and don't let other people beat you to lots and lots of money!

The Morale Boost

Just like any good employer Charter Communications (or their Business division - where I work) does many things to lighten the environment and bring more positive morale to the work place.

Take for instance the following:

Meet Captain Bundle!

He's all the Super-Hero rave. He has a sidekick: a hot Latina bilingual who not only tells customers and potential cable subscribers about the Triple-Play-Bundle, but also educates them about the Latino Tier and calling plans to Mexico that are 2nd to none.

So, every once and awhile we get actual comic strips about the most recent encounter Captain Bundle and his sidekick have with the bundle impostors. More on those at a later date.

But this week Charter provided some of us in Charter Business with another visitor. This guest doesn't have super powers or a handsome hair-do. It isn't "spicy" (unless you added some Tapatio) and it's not bilingual. It was cute, though, but probably not too friendly.

Here he is:

You may wonder why this brought such a morale boost to our team at Charter Business. I would have questioned it, too. But for any doubters out there just know this: Nina Gleichman never lies.

How could you argue with this?